1. How to get to Heaven from Ireland

    I was testing children in my Dublin Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven. 
    I asked them,  ‘If I sold  my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my  money to the church, would that get me into heaven?’  
    ‘NO!’ the children answered.  
    If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the garden, and kept everything   tidy, would that get me into heaven?’ 
    Again, the answer was ‘NO!’ 
    By now I was starting to smile. ‘Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave sweets to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into heaven? 
    Again, they all answered ‘NO!’. 
    I was just bursting with pride for them. 
    I continued, ‘Then how can I get into heaven?’ 
    A six year-old boy shouted out: “YUV GOTTA BE FOOKN’ DEAD….” 

    It’s a curious race, the Irish.

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